Thursday, May 30, 2013

Manageability, one baby step at a time

So why all the sudden blog posts? Why the outpour of photos? We have to move to a lower level apartment (good ole heart,  paired with high risk pregnancy), which started a several month quest for a first floor available within our complex.  Then suddenly, our downstairs neighbors moved out! Let's just move down stairs! How easy would that be!

Then the apartment policy came up: for transfers; they view the current unit, as is, so as to avoid moving one problem unit to another unit. Understandable. But  oh-my-God!  You've seen my photos!  I can't have them in here!!  They might evict just because of the current state of chaos, and that's before packing to move chaos! Eeeeks!!

*** I AM SICK AND TIRED OF LIVING THIS WAY!   I WILL NOT TOLERATE IT ANY LONGER!! ***

I have asked friends and family for help (watching kiddos while hubby and I purge, pack, and stack... or cleaning and packing) and help asap. We already took all the yardsale items [another project] out of the house and brought them to storage for the next 2 weeks until the yardsale. We've bagged a few bags of donatables. We've cleaned up the daily mess and attacked our mountain of laundry. (Albeit now a mountain of clean laundry -- need someone to fold and hang because I can't.) We've purged an entire closet of things.

This is all such good progress!  But it's not enough. After the hectic weekend, help has said to come. We are hoping that the beginning of next week, we will be in a position to move forward with the apartment transfer process and allow them into the home once it's tolerable.

Unmanageability Part 3

... and then there are the cupboards, frig, cabinets, and other shelving units...

What on earth happened to my tidy, uncomplicated life?!  I used to keep everything where it belonged, and had a few boxes of crafty things... but child bearing and a debilitating condition, brought me to this point ....not even the cupboards are safe.

I used to practice the prinicple of just enough. As a single person, I had 2 plates, 2 bowls, pot n pan, 3 coffee mugs (it so sucks when you neeeeed coffee and the only mug you have is dirty), and half of a cabinet of food items. Oh, and a dorm sized frig. As a sahm mother of 2 and one enroute, we have a stack of plates n bowls n mugs, plus the kids plastic plates n bowls n cups n lids, a cupboard full of pots n pans, 3 cupboards and a small pantry of foods, and an apartment sized frig... that is NOT big enough!!

How can I ask for more when what I have is totally out of control?!

I love to cook but am so overwhelmed and out of energy, rarely can I even get to whatever foods I need to prepare... much less cook it. GAH!

Unmanageability Part 2

...and the chaos doesn't stop with the main rooms...

Our closets and dressers are under utilized and unorganized.  Stacked boxes with who-knows-what's  inside. If we don't know what's in there, why keep it?! We've been working on the concept: one in, one out. For every 'new'  item we adopt, one gets donates (or sold if we absolutely have to recover the cost- this is becoming less and less, as we are more in the mode of GET IT OUT!)  And a flat surface is my nemesis,  becomes a "hot spot" in a moments notice.

The bathrooms are more manageable,  I believe that's because they're smaller rooms and I can attempt to clean up or just wipe down the surfaces (given my physical limitations). FlyLady calls it a swish &swipe... works for me!

Friday, May 24, 2013

Unmanageability

I am powereless over people, places, and things.... and MY LIFE has become UNMANAGEABLE.

I am a sahm of  two, three and under, in a high risk pregnancy with baby3, on a  modified bed-rest of sorts, living in a 1000sq ft apartment... with a very supportive husband, recovering from a disease, who works full time, making 20k a year. Whew, what a mouth full. Since motherhood,  my life has been upside down, backwards and sideways.  Dont get me wrong, I LOVE being a mommy and all the wonder and joy you get from parenthood... but it's all upside down, backwards and sideways!

My heart condition has decided that pregnancy and parenting are enough, and its deciding to take a break. Meaning; I must have corrective surgery in the next couple of years, if I want to live and grow with my family.  Which means, everything I've ever known (energy, ability, emotions, desires, dreams, goals, expectations as a mother) has changed... drastically. In a relatively short amount of time.

What this has done to the household, the level of inability and lack of serenity,  is unreal (not including the fact that there are two able bodied, active toddlers living here). I will disclose photos because I know I'm not the only one who's been here in this situation. The Fly Lady has summed it up wisely: CHAOS.  An acronym for "Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome".
(http://flylady.net)

Let me take a moment to say clearly: I am thankful for what I have, all that's been provided, and all the change that has happened during these few years. Progress is progress no matter how small. It all counts!

We have walkways throughout the house. Stacks of boxes, piles of stuff, in every possible location. My understanding is, the only differences between us and a "hoarder" (as in someone conflicted with the disease that controls the emotions and thinking) is that we willingly and eagerly purge items, and we are amidst habit-changing lifestyle changes. We are ridding our entire lives of clutter, one bag or box at a time. It just isn't fast enough for my likings!